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From the desk of Laura

Grief & Organizing: When should I go through my spouse's belongings?

4/1/2023

 
Today we are going to talk a little bit about the intersection between grief and home organizing.  When a loved one passes away, we are often left to the task of not only grieving their absences but also facing the physical reality of their items left behind.  

When should I go through my spouse's belongings?  Notice the word "should".  This is not a math equation with one answer.  There is no one "right answer".  This is a very personal question that will vary.  Much like the grief process, each person will be ready to go through different categories of their spouse's belongings at different times.  
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Part 3: Your Home is Not a Storage Unit: Setting Boundaries with Non-Household Members

11/6/2020

 
This is part 3 in a series about not using your home as a storage unit.  In part 1, we discussed how your home should be for living; it should be filled with items that you use now and enjoy having around.  In part 2, we reflected on whether or not we were storing any items for non-household members and what our motivations were behind those decisions.  If feelings of resentment surface, this is a sign that it may be time to make some changes.  In part 3, we will discuss how to set boundaries with those non-household members. 

​Your home is your home.  You have the right to choose what to keep there.  You get to decide if other people’s items get to take up space in your home.  As you reflect, do know that it does take time, space, and money to store other people’s things in your home.  You will need to spend time keeping up with them, organizing them, and cleaning them.  You pay for all of the space in your home, whether you are renting or owning.  You can choose to do so.  But you can also choose not to.  These reflections are not meant to make you feel bad about your choices.  They are instead meant to help you to take a step back to look at the situation, to sort out your own feelings and to ultimately be confident with the choices that you are making. 
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Part 2:  Your Home is Not a Storage Unit: Are You Storing Other People's Items in Your Home?

11/2/2020

 
Are you storing other people’s items in your home?  People who don’t actually live there? 
… a grown child’s toys and memorabilia
… your brother’s furniture that doesn’t fit in his current home
… clothes or tools you borrowed from a friend
… items you inherited from deceased family members
… your great aunt’s furniture that you really don’t like
 
Working as a professional organizer, I find that many people do have other people’s belongings stored in their home.  The reasons are vast and varied.   (Link to Part 1: Your Home is Not a Storage Unit.)
 
There’s nothing necessarily wrong with having other people’s items in your home. But if you feel resentful about it, it may be time to take a closer look at why: 
 What is your motivation for keeping other people’s items?

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Part 1: Your Home is Not a Storage Unit

10/28/2020

 
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Our homes are meant for us to live in… to do life in. They are meant to be filled with things that help us to live and things that make us happy while we are living there.  Our homes are not meant to be a storage unit... filled with boxes or piles of things that you don’t actually use. 

Take a moment to reflect on your home... are you using it the way you want to?  If it feels more like a storage unit, it may be time to reassess and declutter.


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    My name is Laura, and I love all things organizing! 

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